The Pastiche

 

Front Page

Quote of the Day

Luke, I am Your Mother

Scottie
Schedule
Shenanigans

Page 2

Quote

New Organization
Announces
Presence on Campus

CopShop

Page 3

Quote

Pres. Bullock &
Family Evicted

Bullock to be
Replaced

Inebriated Universe

Page 4

Quote

Sidewalk Chalk
Banned

Energizer Bunny
to Visit Campus

"But Officer..."

Page 5

Quotes

Restaurant Review:
Gourmet Delights
where Least
Expected

Movie Review:
May the Force
Give me a Break!

Page 6

Quote

Don't be
Alarmed by
New Alarms

Physical
Plant Goes
Disco

Global
Awareness:
Destination
Albania!

Page 7

Quotes

New P.E.
Requirements
Announced

Top 10
Reasons I
didn't Make it
to Class

Page 8

Quote

English Dept.
Announces
Curriculum
Changes

Most Popular
Career for
Class of '87:
Professional
Student

New
Advances in
ITS

Page 9

Joke of the
Day

Agnes Scott
Spa and
Bath?!?

New SGA
Constitution
Redefines
Administrative

Withdrawal
Policy

Page 10

Quote

But Seriously,
Folks...

 

 

The Profile, the student newspaper of Agnes Scott College (little place outside of Atlanta that you've never heard of), has a long-standing tradition of the April Fools' Day paper, in which all seriousness is abandoned for the sake of the craziest and/or more satirical stories the staff can create. In some years the Low Profile, as it's generically called (each issue has its own special P-name), is the most-read issue.

Then, in 1997, an "editor" who thought she was God's gift to college journalism decided there was no room for such "frivolity". Unfortunately, she had already alienated her staff with her lack of professional courtesy, ethics, and skills, and they basically pronounced a giant "fuck you" upon her and went off to make it themselves, soliciting donations of time, money, and materials from the campus community.

The result was the Pastiche--written in two or three sessions of creative exuberance, with dork moments galore, accompanied by an overdose of chocolate and Star Wars, and cobbled into final form in an 16-hour all-nighter the day before spring break.

Maybe it wasn't the greatest of the Low Profiles.

But as far as we know, it's the only one online!